Dawn Talk

Putting the cards on the table

• Sarah and I are done. I’m only still in that situation because I have to be, not because I want to be. I really only have a year or two before she finishes school, and will have an income, so that I won’t have to FULLY support her financially when we get divorced.
• I don’t want poly any more. I want a committed, monogamous partner, and I want that to be you.
• There is nobody else, and I don’t want there to ever be anyone else.
• I love what we have, and I don’t really want it to change. I’m not saying I want us to instantly become a sappy Hallmark couple, I just want to know that this is something real, and has a future.

What I want to know

• Do you see a future for us?
• I know that our situation is unique, and there would be some unique challenges to work through, but I’m fully willing to work through them together. Are you?
• Is there anything that bothers you about me, or anything that you would want me to change/do differently?

My concerns

• Communication:
  • I feel like I need to back you into a corner to have a conversation like the one we’re having here.
  • When I say ‘I love you’ or ‘I miss you’. It really hurts when you say ‘I know’. I’m not saying I want you to just say it back if you don’t mean it, but ‘I know’ just feels very hurtful to me.